“For many are called, but few are chosen“ is a phrase from the New Testament (found in the Gospels of Matthew and Luke) that I once struggled to understand – and even resented for its apparent elitism and injustice. Only later did I begin to grasp its meaning: what it truly means to be called, why not everyone who is called becomes one of the chosen, and what this signifies on a psychological level. In this article, I share my understanding of this passage.
The will to grow
In my work as a psychotherapist, I have observed how people respond differently to our work together. Some attempt to escape the message their suffering is trying to convey, clinging to the familiar, while others choose to pay the price required for the birth of something new. Sooner or later, positive changes begin to unfold in their lives. Morgan Scott Peck refers to this willingness to pay the price as “the will to grow,” considering it the key to effective therapeutic work.
“It is possible for a person to be very seriously ill and at the same time have the will to grow. In such a case, success is usually achieved. On the other hand, a person who is only mildly disturbed – as far as we can define mental disturbance, but lacks mental will – will not move an inch from his mental illness. Hence I come to the belief that the patient’s will to grow is the decisive factor determining the outcome of the process as successful or unsuccessful. This factor, however, is not at all accepted or understood by modern psychiatric theory.”
Morgan Scott Peck, “The Road Less Traveled” p. 287*
But what does the will to grow actually mean? And why do some people possess it while others don’t? According to Peck, it is essentially a phenomenon identical to love, as only those who truly love are able to grow through suffering. It is also linked to the uncanny, as people with difficult childhoods who were deprived of parental love can successfully heal from their traumas, while others – who received much more love – may fail to respond to even the most loving treatment from a psychotherapist. For Peck, this force is the true essence of God’s grace – “a powerful, external force that operates through the unconscious and through others who can truly love, as well as through other, mysterious ways that we don’t fully understand”. However, even this is not a sufficient explanatory principle, as this grace is available to everyone.
“Why, then, do only some people grow spiritually despite the circumstances of their childhood and others do not? I am convinced that grace is available to everyone, that we are all equally enveloped by the love of God. The only answer I can give is that most of us would rather not hear the call and reject his help. The words of Christ, “Many are called, but few are chosen,” I would paraphrase as “We are all called by grace, but very few of us choose to respond to the call.”
Morgan Scott Peck, “The Road Less Traveled” p. 288 *
It becomes clear that the expression “For many are called, but few are chosen” has nothing to do with elitism or injustice. What makes us “chosen” is not something external, but the choices we make ourselves. The choice is simple: in Christian terms, it is whether we take the road to Calvary and drink the bitter cup to the dregs, or whether we try to bargain for a price we must still pay to enter the kingdom of God.
In my professional experience, it often unfolds like this: A person comes to you, asking for help with their problem, and you show them a “path that brings solutions.” They agree with your reasoning, look down the path, and see that it is hard, long, and lonely. If they choose to walk it, they will have to accept the inevitability of suffering and the limitations of life. They must also take responsibility for their life, stop blaming others, and let go of a victim mentality. At best, they understand what you’re telling them intellectually, agree with you, and then walk away. Time passes, and they come back again, asking the same question – how to help themselves and what the path is – speaking as if there was no prior conversation.
This is how I understand what “For many are called and few are chosen” means – when suffering invades our lives, everyone hears the call, but while some people choose to bargain, others choose to pay the price. They let go of what they have clung to. They take the narrow road and go through the eye of the needle.
“Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, which leadeth to destruction, and many are they that pass through it. For narrow is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it.”
Luke 18:25.
It seems that the gate is narrow so that only those whose hands are empty can pass through. They have let go of attachments and identifications with the things and phenomena of the world of the transient.
Fidelity to one’s own law
To be chosen is to be willing to place the Spirit as the mediator between yourself and the world. This does not require abandoning worldly desires, but when inner conflict arises, your inner values and readiness for growth must take precedence over them. Jung refers to this as “fidelity to one’s own law,” which he describes as “the attitude the religious man must have toward God” (“The Development of Personality,” p. 296). According to Jung, we develop both under the “pressure of compulsion” and by “conscious moral obligation.” These two forces are at the heart of our personality’s development. While we do not consciously choose the former, the latter is a matter of conscious moral choice – and it is this choice that makes us chosen.
“No one develops his personality because he is told it is useful or advisable to do so. Nature has never been influenced by well-meant advice. Nature, including human nature, is driven by the compulsion of causality. Nothing changes without necessity, least of all human personality. It is terribly conservative, not to say inert. Only extreme necessity can drive it. The development of personality, too, is not subject to desires, commands, and views, but only to necessity; it needs the motivating compulsion of inner or outer destiny…
The words, “Many are called, but few are chosen” (Matthew, 11:14), are more appropriate here than ever, for the development of personality from its germ to full consciousness is both a gift and a curse-its first consequence being the conscious and inevitable separation of the individual from the indistinguishability and unconsciousness of the herd. This means only one thing – loneliness. There is no more comforting word for the case. From this loneliness, neither successful adaptation nor unhindered adjustment to our surroundings, no family, no society, and no position will free us. The development of personality is a happiness which is dearly paid for. Those who talk about it most think least of the consequences, which are enough to shake one to the foundations and which frighten the weaker spirits.”
K.G. Jung, “The Development of Personality”, pp. 293-294*
Bargains in individuals who have felt the pressure of compulsion – whether through loss, illness, difficult relationships, depression, alcoholism, or other challenges – occur because they are unwilling to let go of what they are clinging to. Even if they consciously say, “Yes, this is the path I want to follow,” a part of them resists. They only mimic the act of answering the call. They desire resurrection but reject crucifixion. They long for a new life but refuse to let go of the old one. This inner conflict arises because they don’t want to pay the price. And the price is steep because the reward is great. In Christian terms, it is called “life in God,” and in analytical psychology, it is referred to as “individuation”.
One of the purposes of individuation in the second half of life is to prepare us for its end: death. From Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross’s research on the dying process, we know that bargaining is one of the stages people go through before fully accepting their imminent death. The process begins with denial (1), moves through anger (2) and bargaining (3), continues with the experience of depression (4), and ultimately culminates in acceptance (5). While bargaining occurs in the middle of this journey, it is acceptance that ultimately brings peace.
To continue to use the metaphorical language of the parables in the Bible, the kingdom of God is like a king who makes a wedding to his son and sends his servants to call the invitees to the wedding. But no one comes because the oxen, the fields, the marriage are more important to them. The king is angry that the invitees turn out to be unworthy and orders his servants to go to the crossroads and invite everyone they find (Matthew 89), or to the streets and alleys of the city where the poor, the infirm, the lame, and the blind are (Luke 14:16-35).
“And the lord said unto the servant, Go out into the highways and hedges, and as many as thou find, cause them to come in, that my house may be filled. For I say unto you, none of them that are bidden shall taste of my supper. For many are called, and few are chosen. And a multitude of the people went with him: and he turned and said unto them, Except a man come unto me, and hate his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his very life, he cannot be my disciple: and he that taketh not his cross, and followeth after me, cannot be my disciple.
Gospel of Luke, chapter 14:24-26
The Gospel of Luke speaks with the expressiveness of its time, reflecting the mindset of the people of that era. Interpreting it literally would be a mistake. However, if we view it as a symbol of spiritual processes, its meaning becomes clear. It is not about literally giving up or hating our family; rather, it speaks of prioritizing “fidelity to our own law” over attachment to familial bonds.
“Personal development is an unpopular, risky endeavor, an unwelcoming detour off the beaten path, a desert wandering fit for hermits. No wonder only a few dare to embark on this adventure.”
C.G. Jung, The Development of Personality, p. 298
So we come back to the question at the beginning of this article – what is it that drives some people under duress to make a conscious choice to carry the cross of their lives, but is missing in those who bargain?
“What ultimately makes someone choose their own path, and with that, pull themselves as if out of a fog from an unconscious identity with the mass? It can’t be necessity, because it is the same for everyone, but most seek an outlet in the conventional. Nor can it be the moral solution, because as a rule, people choose the norm. What then is it that drives us so inexorably towards the unusual? We are accustomed to call it a vocation, an irrational factor that fatefully drives us to emancipation from the herd and its beaten paths…(and which) is not the prerogative of great personalities alone, but is also inherent in ordinary and even insignificant individuals, in a more veiled and unconscious form.”
Jung, The Development of Personality, p. 302
So that’s what I understood about that expression – if you want to be among the chosen, you have to make the choice to carry your cross of life with all that that implies. There is nothing else. Or, as it says in Luke’s gospel, “And whoever does not carry his cross but follows me cannot be my disciple.” Being chosen is not a matter of elitism, but of being able to make the hard choice – to walk the narrow path.
Kameliya Hadzhiyska
∗Note: The quotations are translated from Bulgarian and are not presented as verbatim citations.
