“In the New Era, relationships undergo a fundamental transformation. Relationships often evoke strong emotions within you, ranging from great joy to deep agony. In your relationships, you may become aware of inner pain that is much older than your human experience.”
— Pamela Kribbe, 2005
Below, I present Pamela Kribbe’s ideas on this very important topic, because they illuminate the spiritual perspective on human relationships in the time we are living in.
The first thing that is important to understand is that the intensity of our reactions arises from the collective unconscious, from our shared soul that is undergoing processes of transformation. We participate in these processes through our personal, individual efforts to bring about the same changes within ourselves. The Age of Pisces is coming to an end; the Age of Aquarius is arriving, and the greatest challenge of this exciting time is to heal the trauma of the “cosmic birth” of our individuality.
From a spiritual perspective, the intensity of difficult emotions in our partner relationships comes precisely from the activation of this archetypal wound – the separation of the soul from the Source. Another way to say the same thing is that romantic attraction activates our longing for union and fusion. Yet the true object of this longing does not belong to the world of matter.
“Thanks to the presence of the new energy, it is possible to transform destructive elements into positive ones, into an equal exchange of energies between you and another person. However, healing and personal transformation may also mean that you will release relationships in which you cannot express yourself in the right way.
Often this means that even if you deeply love someone, you may have to say goodbye, because your inner path is leading you elsewhere. Whether it leads you into new relationships or into separation, all of you may encounter great challenges in personal relationships. The call of the heart, the call of heart energies that announces the New Era, has entered your everyday life, and you can no longer ignore this energy.”*
This is the second thing the energies of the new time bring us: separation from people with whom we feel deeply connected. Partnerships that are not based on mutual respect will have a very short lifespan, unlike in the past. This can be accompanied by a strong sense of guilt, but there are also guidelines for working through this painful feeling.
*“If you find yourself in relationships characterized by intense emotions that evoke much pain and anger, yet you cannot break free from them, please understand: nothing obliges you to stay with this person. Often, strong emotions are triggered by deep pain rather than by deep love. The energy of love is exceptionally calm and peaceful, joyful and inspiring. It is not heavy, exhausting, and tragic.
If such feelings are present in a relationship, it is time for separation, so that you do not ‘work through them’ once again.”*
Karmic relationships may be marked by strong attraction in the beginning, but later the connection becomes overly tense and disharmonious. That is why it is important to know that releasing the energy of the old time also includes releasing “ancient” bonds that contain unfinished emotional situations and unlearned lessons. When these lessons are learned, the relationship dissolves. And the most important of these lessons is the lesson of freedom.
*“This is important to realize, because it is one of the many traps in relationships. You are not responsible for your partner, and he or she is not responsible for you. The solution to your own problem does not lie in the behavior of the other person. Sometimes you are so entangled with your partner’s inner child, with the emotionally wounded part of him or her, that you feel you are the only one who can ‘save’ them. Or your partner feels the same about you.
But this does not work. You will only reinforce the other person’s sense of helplessness and victimhood, whereas it may be far more helpful to draw a line and take care of yourself. This is your purpose – to feel whole and complete in yourself. This is the most important condition for truly fulfilling relationships.”*
There will come a time when we will also meet our soul mate. But this is not the essential point. The true aim is to heal the pain of cosmic birth. In order to do this, we must heal our relationship with our inner child – to heal our emotional body.
*“When your loneliness overflows, take your inner child onto your lap. Pay attention to its pain. It longs for total safety – the safety it knew when it was still an embryo. It wants to see this safety in the face of your partner, in the face of your child, in the face of your parents, in the face of the therapist… Then show it your own face. For the inner child, your face is angelic. It goes without saying that you will heal the child in the most absolute way you can imagine. Neither I nor any ‘master’ can do this for you. We can only point the direction.
You are your own saviours.”*
And so, relationships in the New Era begin with a fulfilling relationship with oneself.
And that is both so simple – and so difficult…
Kameliya Hadzhiyska
Note: The quotations are translated from Bulgarian and are not presented as verbatim citations.
