Like The sleeping beauty


„Imagine that from now on, there is nothing you “must do” in your life.

If you would really grant yourself that freedom, your life would consistently flow smooth and easy. I understand that this runs counter to much that you have been told by your parents, teachers, employers, etcetera. Society imparts on you that you have to work hard and diligently to develop the necessary skills and abilities to cope with reality. It tells you to think small and focus on what is possible rather than on what you dream and hope for. Not only society tells you this, even a lot of spiritual teachings have a rather stern and disciplinary outlook on how to achieve enlightenment.“

Pamela Kribbe, „Heart centered living“, p. 172

To allow ourselves to relax, in the trust that all is fine and ultimately we are going to have what we want, is one of the hardest things in life. Furthermore, for the Saturn type, this is not just difficult, but impossible, unreal, illogical. People whose core values are hard work, discipline, seriousness and responsibility cannot even grasp this point of view. Their mind spontaneously rejects it, unable to understand that the essence of it is the ability for deep relaxation and releasing the neurotic need for control and achievements. They do not realize this is the unconditional love that grows only in the soft soil of accepting things as they are, the soil open to and equally welcoming any seeds coming into it.

I have found that one of the best ways to deal with the mind’s resistance is to respect its desire to argue and defend. Let’s listen to it, hear what it has to tell us. Well, Saturn has many things to tell us and they are valuable. Saturn is the archetype that rules the laws in the material world, the one which helps us the most in building up our sense of inner power, pushing us to achieve things on our own. It is the Ruler, strict and fair, creating circumstances to judge the value of the individual. It is conditional love, but as the rules are fair, one agrees to follow them.

The hard work archetype argues that if we want to get satisfaction from what we achieve, then we need to work on our own to get it. Things received as gifts or without great effort are not appreciated; moreover, they do not add any value to our most important creative product: our true Self. The difference between “I did it” and “I received it” is quite substantial.

After listening to Saturn’s arguments though, we can answer that the coin has another side, too, and this is the path of least resistance, acceptance, going with the flow, unconditional love, opening the boundaries, creative ambiguity, enjoying life, right here, right now. For people who have not learnt Saturn’s lessons of inner strength yet, Pamela Kribbe’s message is not just inappropriate, but even harmful. Still, this is the right message for people who for quite some time have been carrying the burden of responsibility, hard work, seriousness and discipline. It tells them that it is about time they passed this burden in the hands of Life, because this is the way, the only way, to synchronize the little will of their own Ego with the broader will of their Self. And in case their mind refuses to understand and accept this message, here are some arguments to support it.

What we know from mysticism is that the gate to the Kingdom of God is the present, life right here, right now. This message has no exceptions, or if any exist, I am not aware of them. Therefore, the surest way to miss the gate is to ask to be what we are not, or to put conditions to Life in order to accept it as it is. The key word here is acceptance, and there is no way for this to happen if our mind is constantly busy making things better. Osho has said it really well: the constant effort at betterment is a trick of the mind trying to reject the truth of things as they are—i.e. diverse.

Only a relaxed mind can see reality without any neurotic distortions, which is very difficult to achieve. Because it is not a matter of achieving it, but of letting it happen. You cannot force it to happen through your conscious intention or personal will, but you can maintain a steadfast intention about it, wisely waiting for the moment when the pendulum swing will reverse. This is the moment when you have been in control for too long (or rather, your anxious part has not been letting you let go), and clenching the steering wheel has made your fingers so tired that they start releasing the grip.

The change that happens without our conscious efforts is best described in the story of Sleeping Beauty. The beautiful girl wakes up from her eternal sleep without doing anything special. When the right time comes, a hundred years after she has been put under a spell, the prince comes, kisses her, and she comes back to life. Moreover, there is no need for the prince to do something exceptionally heroic; even the hedge that never let anyone through before all of a sudden opens up by itself and makes way for him. If we interpret the breaking of the spell in a symbolic way, we can see that it is all about time: we must allow some time during which we trust the life that flows under the surface of our consciousness to do its work. And when the right time comes—not a day sooner or later,—the gates that have been previously closed for us swing open by themselves. Something happens—from the inside or from the outside—and gives us all we have wanted for so long, but have never managed to get, because the princess was deep asleep, governed by forces beyond her personal will.

My personal experience and observations match the symbolic interpretation of this fairy tale. I managed to achieve a relaxed mind not by force of will, but when the right time came. Still, I made some contribution, too: thanks to the fact that earlier, I had reached my limit within the stern and restrictive Saturn energy, I managed to feel the release of that entire burden. This resembles weight lifting in the gym. If you want your Self to have strong muscles, then you need to carry loads and make efforts. And once you leave the gym, the weights remain there, but the strength of your muscles stays with you: this has been the main goal of sweating in there. As the Self has got stronger and developed a sense of boundaries, we can take another deep dive into life and go with its flow, without any fear of drowning. Even better, if lucky synchronicity start occurring without any effort, it is because the fair ruler Saturn has decided to reward us for our earlier efforts.

One of the main characteristics of the individuation process is that it follows the natural rhythm of life. It is a process that cannot be pushed or forced, as it happens through the power of inner growth and in close collaboration with the unconscious. It takes more time than we would like and as a rule goes through periods of frustration and desperation. There is a blessing in disguise here though: we learn what is under our control and what is not, realizing that there are so many things we think we can control but in fact cannot and there is no way we ever could. We also learn to love unconditionally: to accept and go with the flow, knowing there is Wisdom inside us that is greater than we can imagine. The same Wisdom that tells the tall thorny walls when it is time to withdraw and let the Prince in, to kiss us and bring us back to life.